The Day that I lost my cool!

In my ex work place, I was known to be Ms Cool..  Not fashionnable lah!  But more as someone who is always in control and never get stressed by whatever that happened at work..  Ex colleagues would be amazed with my non reaction whenever the stress level went up to breaking point.

But a few days ago, I really lost my cool at this new work place..  You must understand, it is really unlike me.  But the boss whom I worked with now is simply terrible..  He shared some info during a meeting and gave our team the direction to go for a certain project..  But when I verified with him again one week later, he claimed that he never gave us the direction as mentioned..  I was totally confused and got another team member to confirm.  Even when both of us confirmed that we heard the same thing from him, he insisted that we were putting words into his mouth..  We tried the contact the remaining team member but he was insistent that we were lying.  This is not the first time when he would deny what he said.  He would tell you to do A today and change to B a few days later, insisting that I was not listening to him..  What made my blood boil was his cutting remarks every time when we disagree..  I finally lost my cool and banged on the table to insist that he did say what we heard..  Not proud of myself and was unable to have a good night sleep on that same day..  I nearly wanted to just type out my resignation letter and throw it to his arrogant face!  Is God trying to teach me some things here?  Maybe to be more humble?  Or more patient?  I don’t know,,  But I just know that he is one of the push factors for me to consider taking up the teaching opportunity.

a new chapter in my life

Many of you may know that I had returned to full time work after one full year of staying home with the kids.  I really thank God for providing me with a job so quickly in the midst of such bad times in the economy.  The family took a while to adjust to the new routines.  No more sleeping late ( till 7.30am) but all of us must be ready to leave the house at 7.15am else Ariel and Elkan will miss the school bus.  My heart aches whenever Elkan complained about waking up so early.  And also when I had to force Kyla to finish her homework before she can go to bed every night..  As there will be no more luxury of waiting till the next morning to finish them..

My new job is demanding and I would be mentally drained by the time I dragged myself out of the office..  Hubby is very understanding and he made a point to pick me up from work every day so that I need not take the public transport back.. He has also offered to take over some of the housework so that I will not feel so stretched..  Thank God for providing me with such as a supportive life partner.

A new development came last week when the poly that I was teaching part time asked me to join them as full time staff..  After much praying and thinking, I decided to give it a go..  Retailing is probably not a sutable career for mothers who have kids..  You are on “duty” as long as the stores are open..  In fact, colleagues from stores sometimes call me as late as 11pm to ask me about work stuff.    And so I opted for the teaching job as it will have more stable working hours.  Do pray along with me, that whatever decisions I make, will be pleasing to God and be within His will for us..

Hong Kong

Two years ago, we made travel arangements to visit Hong Kong..  But then my FIL had a stroke and we had to cancel the trip..

And when we had to cancel out mission trip to bangkok this week due to the circumstances in that country, we rushed to book the air tickets and hotel once our pastor declared the cancellation of the mssion trip..  Thank God we managed to get the tickets and hotel reservations..  Yippee!  I am looking forward to the trip..  Though i always go Hong Kong for business trips, this is our first trip as a family..  Can’t wait 

Back To work

After some prayers, i decided to look for a full time job started next Feb when I finish my teaching contract with the Poly…  But God has other plans apparently.  Within one week of starting my job search, i got a job offer!!  Truly amazing when you look at the retrenchment and the recession news in the papers..  When I got the call to attend the interview, I prayed that God will open the right door / doors and shut those that are not in His will..  And I guess He did..  The job is so-so, pay not terrific, so not very keen but most importantly, I had to trust that this is from God since I prayed that prayer…

So now, i am preparing myself and the family for the coming changes..  Kyla is not happy that mommy is no longer able to fetch her from school.. Hope that the family can all adapt to the changes, me included..  Having stayed home with the kids for about two years now.. 

ariel year end concert

Ariel just had her year end concert at LSK..  And doesn’t she look great!  She gave a great performance too!  Of course, any proud parent will say that! 

Oops! He did it again!

Elkan who is so cute in my eyes can be very naughty in other people’s views.  He was being complained by the teacher several times for mis-behaving in class and he did it again this week.. The crime?  He called someone “fatty”…  Well, to be honest, the girl ( yes, its a girl) is his classmate and really a bit on the heavy side..  (fat lah!)  Of course I really gave him a hard time in front of the teacher, to make the promise not to use that word again..  Hubby and my BIL used this word sometimes when playing..  Like, ” See, daddy is a fatty bom bom!”  or “Uncle Fabian is a fatty!”  The men would laugh at themselves with such remarks..  But I guess, it is hurting when the comment is directed at a small girl.. Teacher said that the mother in question was very angry and upset that her precious gal is being called a fatty..    Elkan was confused intially when told that it is a “bad” word to use..  “But she is really fat!”  he replied.. So I told him that it is very hurting and will make the girl very sad..  Then he promised not to call her fatty..  But, he is actually making an accurate observation right?

back to tingkat

I started my part time teaching again this month and had no choice but to order tingkat for the dinner again as I will not have the time to cook..

I must say, I quite enjoy the cooking..  Bought a recipe book with dishes meant for kids and experimented quite a few of them.. Its been a joy to see the kids enjoying the dishes and finishing up their food..  Favourites?  Pork chops, fish fillets, potatos balls, lotus roots and peanut soup, carrot/corn soup, sardines, steamed eggs, chicken wings etc..   Even hubby has made special request to have the lotus roots/peanut soup on several occasions..  But I also look forward to not having to wash up the cooking utensils everyday, after the cooking..  A bit more time to prepare for my classes!

Lets see whether this new catering vendor is as good as the last one that I had.

long haul

It has been a long 2 weeks…  Elkan came down with stomach flu two sats ago..  Kyla had the symptons on Tue and recovered enough to return school on last Friday…  And guess what, Ariel’s fever and stomachache came on last Sat…  Thank God she is well enough to return school today..

Its been a long haul, with interrupted sleep to check on the kids’s temperature every 4 hours for the past two weeks..  No wonder my panda eyes became so obvious, 

Tired is the word

Should I or should I not?

Thinking of returning work on a full time basis…  confused and more confused..  Felt that my kids don’t really need me to be there all the time, like now Kyla is at school and the two younger ones are playing happily by themselves.  I find myself reduntant especially at times like these..  I find that i am not providing value add when I give up my job to stay with them 24 by 7..  They actually “chased” me out of the room whenever I peeped to see what are they playing at..  I am more like a caregiver.  Cooking them meals, bathing them, bringing them to school etc.  Occassionally a hug here and there but even Elkan is growing out of the cuddly phase.  He is too impatient when I tried to hug him just a second longer than desired ( by him!)  He will wriggle away to play with the sisters..

So should I or should I not?

Playing God

Twice a year, I get to play God..  Remember when you were in school and teachers always comforted you when the national exams  were too hard that the examiners will do moderation?  Well, I have been upgraded and I get to play God too when it’s time to moderate the students school results..   Not enough As for the examination results, i add bonus points to those who are borderline Bs..  Not enough Ds, I “punished” the students by taking away their participation marks or their project marks so that they were downgraded to Ds..  Until the final statistics is “sui sui” with the standard number of As, Bs,Cs, Ds and of course you will need some failures as well to “show” that your subject got some standard one!  Oh man!  You may think it is so shiok to play God but I am telling you that the feeling sucks!!  Now I remember why I left the full time teaching profession many years back..  Now I am only a part time teacher and not as attached to the students..  maybe can ease some of the guilt.  But I really hate mucking around with somebody’s results..