monster mom

I did something really horrible on monday night.

I was alone with the three kids at home and Ariel was having a major melt down.  She insisted on following hubby out even though we had told her no.  Paul had left without her to fetch his parents somewhere.  And I was alone, tired after work, stressed with all the housework still waiting for me and Ariel who refused to stop crying. 

I threatened her with the cane ( ya, still in control and did not use the cane) but that did not work.  Told her to stop or else….          She continued with her,”I want to go with daddy………!!”

I threatened to place her in the quiet room to let her ( and me, of course) cool down.  Still crying.  So I put her in the study room and closed the door.  She started screaming and opened the door herself.  Then continued with her,”I want to go with daddy………..!!” 

Elkan is scared and clinged on to me.  Kyla is in her usual “bochap” attitude watching her cartoon shows.  And Ariel continued to scream!! 

I told her to stop it, right away.  Daddy is not home already and there is no use screaming about going out with him.  She continued…..  This goes on for nearly twenty minutes.  I can feel my patience slipped away as the minutes ticked by.

In my fit of anger, I pushed her right back into the study room cos she will never go in willingly by herself.  I think I was using too much force because she stumbled backwards and fell.  Hit the floor hard.  At that instant, I froze.  What have I become?  Have I turned into this monstor that pushed her kids?? 

In her shock, Ariel stopped crying.  Then she started again. 

I caught her in one tight hug and said sorry for pushing her down.  I was so ashamed of myself..  I shouldn’t have pushed her so hard.  My heart broke as I realized that I had physically hurt the child whom I love dearly.

Ariel stopped her melt down, finally.  But I will always remember this day that I hurt my child and vowed never to let that happen again. 

the complaining singaporeans

First and foremost, I need to stress that this blog is entirely my own thoughts and views.  If you disagree and or want to write me your comments, please do not swear or try to shoot me down with your better writing skills.

Here we go.

On the way to work this morning, hubby mentioned that there are a lot of people complaining in their blogs about the Singapore government.   In general, they are complaining that the Singapore government is not good enough, no political freedom, no freedom of speech, no freedom in the press. no freedom in etc….  There are people out there who are even willing to accept Chee Soon Juan as an alternative.  Come on people, this man is the same one that shot down Singapore in the foreign press.  Who blatantly go against the Singapore laws when he goes about canvassing for sympathy votes.  Etc etc .  You must be crazy to think he can do a better job than the Singapore government.

Anyway I told hubby that the Singapore government has done a fantastoc job so far.  I was given a chance to receive an education even though my family was not rich.  My parents and five kids squeezed into a 3 room HDB flat back then.  Life was tough with my dad as a single breadwinner and five kids to feed.  We attended a neighbourhood school and received yearly bursery that helped to buy the textbooks and uniforms.  School fees were like $3.50 per month.  Daily allowance was $0.40 for school recess.  That can buy you a bowl of bee hoon but no extras for soft drinks at that time.  Textbooks and clothes were passed down from one kid to the next.  Toys were skipping ropes made of rubber bands, five stones made by mom.  Or games that did not require anything except lots of running like catching, hide and seek, greenspots.  We had so much fun then! 

And all five or us managed to graduate from a local university when the government allowed the CPF to be used to pay for the university fees.  No one was denied a chance in receiving an education just because they can’t afford it under the wise management of the Singapore government.

Now armed with degrees, all five of us are holding jobs that pay well enough so that we can no longer call ourselves poor.  If you complained about the Singapore government for not doing a good job, you better visit the developing countries such as Indonesia, India, China etc..   Poor children were never given any chance in receiving any education, and it is very likely that they will not be able to get out of the poverty cycle.  You want a government who runs a country like that?  I am sure grateful that Singapore government is not!

Now a working mother of 3 kids,  I work full time and the kids attend a local childcare.  Even the youngest, who attends the infant care when he just turned three months old.  Monthly fees were $1,150 after government subsidy.  It certainly helped us when government announced the baby bonus scheme and we only need to fork out half of that amount after the baby bonus.  And out there are couples who earned more than $8,000 per household complaining that the government is not helping them enough to have a baby.  Come on, you whiners.  No one owe anyone anything.  If you really want to have a baby, you can choose a simplier lifestyle.  Drive a smaller car, or even consider the efficient transport system in Sinapore.  Stay in a HDB flat.  If you are not eligible for a 4 room flat, get a HDB 5 room, masionette or executive etc that is on re sale.  Go to the swimming pool or work out at the gym at the community centre instead of paying for gym membership.  Eat at foodcourt or hawker centres instead of restaurants.  Go for the $0.70 kopitiam coffee every morning instead of the $3.90 starbucks coffee.  Buy a Perlini handbag that costs $29.90 instead of that Gucci bag that costs $1299.  Buy a Giordano polo that costs $19 instead of a Polo Ralph polo at $119 

Choose to deliver your baby at KK hospital and stay at a B ward to get government subsidy.  When baby is born, you can choose to get a maid ( $530 per month),  a nanny ( about $350 – $500 per month), infant care ($600 per month after subsidy) or be full time mom.   If you still can’t afford a baby after making all the changes, please enlighten me with your financial committments because it will not make any sense.

I am going to stop work and be a full time mom soon.  I had worked out the sums and it will work on one income.  If we can do it, I am sure that there are a lot of people who can as long as they choose to make changes in their lifestyles. 

And so I repeat myself, I do not belong to an elite group.  I am not rich or some MP’s daughter.  You can leave me a comment if you have any but please do not swear or be rude.  And I do not appreciate any comics strips that are named after me or place my disfigured face on the internet.